i bet! XD

-jv

damn. lol.
you had a busy day. XD

-jv

It's not your fault you and your mom have a shitty relationship. Just tell them she was drunk or something.

-JV

thanks. :)

and i would go to a friend's house and not want to die.

-jv

i'm sorry, hun.

-jv

I believe I have already been added. lol

-Jessy

soory but who g??

interesting dayxxx

i hope ur day is better tommorow

xx mysterygirl08

Sorry to hear that.

-JV

Mkays. :)

xoxo-Jessy

Sorry that today wasn't all the grand.
Neither was mine.
Erm.
I'm sorry.

xoxo-Jessy

Chyeah it did. lol

xoxo-Jessy

Dude, DC was ridiculous. lol.
But the concert was funnnn!

xoxo-Jessy

Ooph.
Nice job, Chelsea. XD

xoxo-Jessy

Soon. :)

xoxo-Jessy

:(

xoxo-Jessy

But you really aren't.
You're really smart. You're doing well in school.

xoxo-Jessy

Well, you're not.
You just believe that, and if your mom says shit to you, then keep thinking that you're not scum.
Cause you aren't, and that's so bitchy of her to do.

xoxo-Jessy

Then I think you should move out, Hun.

xoxo-Jessy

I'm not happeh that you got drunk last night, either, Chels.
You were doing so well. :(

Ignore your mom, okay?

xoxo-Jessy

Always will be. :)

xoxo-Jessy

Why is that?

Hehe. Funny story.
The Push Play tour/show I'm going to?
It's called. Peace. Love. Push Play.
Thought I'd tell you cause you wrote "Peace and love."

XD

xoxo-Jessy

They're crossed. :)

xoxo-Jessy

Hehe.
I'm still planning on going there, too.
Or USA.

xoxo-Jessy

The other place? lol

xoxo-Jessy

That's pretty ridiculous. lol

xoxo-Jessy

I have no reason not to talk to you.

xoxo-Jessy

Oh....Well that part does suck.
:(
Sorry for the moral boost that i didn't supply.

xoxo-Jessy

I'm sure they wouldn't make you change schools.
And that they would probably try to find a foster family nearby.

xoxo-Jessy

If you hate it, or they're mean, I think you can report it to the place you were at before.

Hope things get better.

xoxo-Jessy

Babe, I'm so sorry that I wasn't up anymore!
*hug*
I'm sorry, but you need to get out of that house.
I know you don't want to go into foster care...
But you're seventeen. You'd be out in a year.
It'd be better there then with your mom.

I'm sorry that that probably wasn't what you wanted to hear/read.
Butttt....It's true.

xoxo-Jessy

This is true, also.

xoxo-Jessy

That's a good idea.
Not the sticking with only girls thing.
But letting him play the dad role.
Although, the only girls thing sounds cool, too. :)

xoxo-Jessy

I think I know who you're talking to.
And if it's who I think it is, I think he should just be the other one.
Not the flirty one.
Because a lot of people would get hurt with the flirty one.

But I could totally be wrong?

xoxo-Jessy

It's all good. :)

xoxo-Jessy

*shudders*
Thanks for the disturbing image, Chels. XD

xoxo-Jessy

Sounds like a party. lol

xoxo-Jessy

Haha. Yup. :)

And thank youuu!
How was your college thing?

xoxo-Jessy

Couldn't you just come move here?
With your aunt and uncle?

xoxo-Jessy

i'm always here for you.
you know that.
if you ever need to talk, just drop me a comment, okay?

stay strong<3

xoxo-jessy

Hm. That's interesting...
I gotta go take a shower. XD

xoxo-Jessy

I would be, too.

xoxo-Jessy

Yeah. You make a valid point about the dad-ear thing.

xoxo-Jessy

Well, if he doesn't like you, then you have nothing to worry about.
Unless you like him.
He could just be trying to be a father figure.
But if he does...Then that could be a potential problem.
Since he's married, older than you, and your school's guidance couselor.
And people are already suspicious about you two, right?

xoxo-Jessy

I think you should confront him.
I mean, you two seem to be pretty close.

xoxox-Jessy

Uhmmm...I'm not really sure, actually. lol.
I would say he wants you, maybe.
Because who wouldn't?
But, I'm not sure.
He could just be messing around with you, but then again he could be flirting with you.
Idk.

xoxo-Jessy

I'm really good at math, actually.
It's just soooo tedious!
AGH!

xoxox-Jessy

It's a great stress reliever. :)

Aghhh. I hate algebra II. :(

xoxo-Jessy

Then find other sources. :)
Like, when I'm pissed off, I write stories.
And usually kill the source of my pissed off-ness. lol.
Or I listen to screamy music.

xoxox-Jessy

Good to talk to you again, too. :)

Don't drink, please. It may take away your problems, but it's only temporary.

xoxo-Jessy

you'll always have me. :)

xoxo-jessy

I'm glad we're talking again. :)
And I'm glad that I can help you.
I'm always on, if you ever need anything.

xoxo-Jessy

I've been better, too.
I read a few of your last couple entries.
I'm sorry about everything that has happened.
:)
I know that probably means nothing coming from me, though.

-Jessy

CHELLYBEAR!!!!!!

Thank you. :)

How're you doing, Love!?

xoxo-Jessy

i feel exactly the same bout my parents my mums a back stabbing bitch

who i fucking hate

but i promise it'll get better with time

stay strong
much love Amanda xxx

dont worry. ur not gonna get taken away for being depressed. depression is very common, even in teens.

i understand that you dont want to tell your mom. i dont think the psych is obligated to tell her anything, unless s/he believes that you are in serious danger. i would discuss confidentiality with her/him straight away.

i would talk to the psych. just check her/him out. maybe you will like her - u never know! it could be relaxing to get a load of your mind with somebody who will not be judgemental and has heard it all before. maybe she can give you a whole new perspective on things.

just take care of yourself, k? xx

this may sound weird,but someone does want you_____You
be what you want, be what you need ,lean on yourself and make your self be different,if thats what you need,only"" you""
have that power" to change yourself and your life.

[wildwind]

OMG i was an attendant at my homecoming and i got my own convertable tooooooo!!!!

it was AMAZING!!

hope u had as much fun as i did:)

is he your teacher?

enjoy your game huni

stay strong

much love Amanda xxx

i like it so far. :)

-jess

hey chelsea.
it's jessy.
my e-mail stopped receiving e-mails from here.
so i deleted the old account.
and then my e-mail wouldn't receive the e-mail so i could activate the new one.
so i made a new e-mail.
and this account. lol

long story... :)

jess

Life ISNT who you talk to, how you dress or what party you go to. Life is about doing the thing tha fulfills you and finding people along the way  who love you for who you are. :) Your true friends will love you for who you are. You dont have to do anything to make people like you.  Just be yourself Chels. That's what I do and I've found people who like me for me.

Be yourself, good things will follow. :)

Heyy

Can You Add Me Please

Maybe it IS good to try and move on chels.

and GO CHELS with the serves!!

What are you reading?

wow huni
your real pretty

stay strong

much love Amanda xxx

I"m so happy you had a good night Chels

[MargaretGLT]

ugh i posted that on totally the rong place. Ho hum

Its just the html didnt work on mine so i were gunna copy n paste.

nvm,

Embarassed, but nvm.

So so so so sorry to hear about the crap thats in ur life atm, and i really hope it gets better.

Hang on in there <3

So My name's Freya.

I'm NOT new to MDD, but this is a totally new diary. On this one I'm determined not to come accross as a nuerotic, self-hating scew up.

Sounds like a plan batman.

Somethings you should know about me;

• Yeah, there is this guy, but yuh no..
• okay he has a bitch, alreet?
• I can drink Vodka pure
• ..And wiggle my little toe on it's own. That's my party trick.
• My GHD's blew themselves up
• I always come on in my favorite pants
• I have an eleven year old sister. She's a pain.
• I'm Mysophobic. (google it)

So that's me. Doses of my life as a bored teenager coming very soon.

watchthisspace.

what's Senior day?

and what were the roses for?

cant wait to see

what's Senior day?

and what were the roses for?

cant wait to see th e

what's Senior day?

and what were the roses for?

cant

what's Senior day?

and what were the roses for?

cant wait to

 Is it better at your grandmother's??

and :( about the drunk person

[MargaretGLT]

Halloween is a cool holday!  I have this celtic costume that is wicked awesome. I got it at this ren faire. Are you dressing up for Halloween?

Good luck with Senior Night tomorrow :)

And Glad to hear that your mom is being considerate and thinking of you =)

Hey, i know that you dont want your parents to be replaced, but think about all the support your friend's parents are trying to give you. It's a sign they genuinely care about you.

*smiles* there isnt anything wrong with hoodies and shorts!!

"talk to me, pretties!" *raises eyebrow* is the wicked witch of the west suddenly writing diary entries for you? :P

[MargaretGLT]

yay for reposting :)

uhmn....

oh yeah *remembers what she posted before*

I am glad things are going well for you chels. :))

[MargaretGLT]

yay for reposting :)

uhmn....

oh yeah *remembers what she posted before*

I am glad things are going well for you chels. :))

[MargaretGLT]

omg he sounds like a total freak
iv been stalked before but never by someone i know

what was the thing you had with hi9m?

stay strong
much love Amanda xxx

oh wow chels... you should really report him! >.< *hug* I dont want you to get hurt.

. Your mom should NEVER hit you...ever...

You're too good for all this Chels. You deserve a lot better. *hug*

Aw its ok if you cry at your last practice. *sniff* i would too. I cried when i left hs. :(

that's good that you havent seen your mum :)

lol ...i assume the egg was broken?

the FUN song is so much fun to listen to. n.n I still watch Spongebob, even though i'm in college.

 I have a question, If people dont like who you really are chels, are they your true friends?

geesh.. well its not ur fault, its hers lol, well, i dnt know what advise i could give cuz idk what i would do in that situation.. srri :(

<33

wow.. your mom sounds really mean!!.. goshh, but have you tried talking to her?.. maybe that wont work... but idk, maybe you should go to your friends house or something for awhile, just so she can see what u mean to her... good luck!!!

<33

*hug* :(

[MargaretGLT]

Wow that is harsh what your mom just said to you. :(

[MargaretGLT]

Your mom has no justification whatsoever to hate you Chels. You werent to blame for ANYTHING. She should realize that. :(

I'm not sure why she wont talk about your dad. Only you know that. *hug*

why dont you try eating something hot when you feel numb...like a chilipepper or something.

*hug*

lol! i can see the purple streak in your hair!

And chels, its ok to be sad. We all feel sad sometimes and i think you have a legitament reason to be sad. I do understand though that maybe you might not have someone in your life you can trust to understand and accept your emotions of grief towards the loss of your father.

Sometimes we have to forgo what others might think in order to feel better. For example I was depressed over a month or so ago and i tried to keep it inside for as long as i could, but as i did that the depression fed upon itself and got worse and worse. When i started talking to people and accepting help, it got better.

Chels i have a question. What is the worst thing that could happen if you told someone how you truely felt?

that's great that your english teacher liked your piece!!

n.n isnt nature beautiful and calming?

oh you better get most rebellious chels! :P

yay for fall break!

Dont you think emotions are a part of life? If you take away your emotions...does it make you less human and make your life less vivid? of course its your mind's way of protecting you, but...i remember reading in my psych textbook that emotional coping methods are only good over the short term. I forget why.

If one dissassociates to much (which is an emotional coping method i've employed in the past) it leads to amnesia.

I'm not a psychologist or anything, just saying things you might want to consider.

Im sorry but being numb is not a good thing,

I am/was((its complicated I guess))numb and I started to hurt myself to feel,

to be numb is like being dead to most people.

And that is a horible feeling.

hey now, i love reading too!! <= English Literature Major in College

what do you think is preventing you from stating how you really feel?

I suppose we all wonder what it would be like and who we would be if our lives were different.

Just the other day I was pondering what effect it would have if i suddenly didnt exist. How people i've met would be different, who my family would be...

Its impossible to ever fully comprehend.

On second thought maybe Mr Grider was just trying to comfort you by saying that your dad wouldve been proud of you had he still been alive via his comment about him not minding having you as a daughter...

[MargaretGLT]

you know how i feel. :)

*spins around in computer chair*

How are you and the bf getting along?

Will you reschedule the appointment?

glad you feel better chels, though i'm still wary about grider's intentions towards you as a counselor

i know how you feel
and it sucks
im glad you got your braces off though

stay strong
much love Amanda xxx

hey, you got your braces off!!  That's great!

I bet the lisp will go away in time once you get used to having no braces.

Maybe your friend was just having an off day.

I'm so happy you got to talk about everything that was bothering you

yay about the good english grade

Boo about the meeting with Mr. Grider